The Weight of a Shadow
The flight was uneventful, but for Kishan Lal, it was a sudden, terrifying theater of clouds. He pressed his palms flat against the oval window, his breath fogging the glass. “Look, snow down there.”
“Yes, snow,” Arjun said, refusing to correct him.
At some point above the dusty northern plains, the old man’s stamina gave out. His head drooped, slipping sideways until it rested heavily on Arjun’s shoulder. Arjun froze instantly, his chest locking, afraid that the slightest breath would break a fragile, terrifying spell.
His father’s head on his shoulder. The weight of it. The faint scent of cheap mustard oil and old cotton.
Kishan Lal had never leaned on Arjun. Not once. Not when Arjun was nine, shivering in a corner after being struck with a leather belt. Not when Arjun was twenty-one, leaving for Mumbai with a battered suitcase and a rage so pure it felt like ambition. Not when they stood on opposite sides of his mother’s body, two stiff, silent men waiting for a hearse.
Now, at eighty-one, with his mind reduced to scattered sparks, Kishan Lal leaned on his son only because he was completely unaware of who he was. Arjun closed his eyes, swallowed the lump in his throat, and let the weight stay.
They landed in the late afternoon. A hired car drove them through the flat, dusty approach toward the ancient heart of the city. Kishan Lal peered out at the chaotic traffic with the mild, superficial interest of a tourist.
“What a beautiful place.”
“We’re coming into Varanasi, Father.”
“Oh, Varanasi. I went there once. Very old place.”
“When did you go?”
“I don’t know. Very long ago.”
Arjun said nothing. He searched his father’s profile for a twitch of nerves, a micro-expression of belonging—any tear in the fabric of the dementia through which a real memory might bleed. But there was only the smooth, vacant serenity of a man who had misplaced his entire history and felt no urge to find it.
Next on The Stranger’s Son: Episode 4: The Ghost on the Steps. Descending to the river, Arjun confronts a horrifying psychological paradox: he is falling in love with his abuser’s illness.
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